


Take Me Back

by boywonder



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Gen, Missing Scene, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-09
Updated: 2015-01-09
Packaged: 2018-03-06 21:55:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3149654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boywonder/pseuds/boywonder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“You been going through my things?” he asked, voice level to the point of being monotone.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I went in your bag to get the tools you asked me to find.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“That was three days ago, Ellie.”</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take Me Back

“Take me back,” Ellie said from the doorway.

Joel looked up from the gun he was cleaning. He hadn’t even heard her come in. Puzzlement was clear on his face.

“We haven’t been anywhere.”

“Back to Utah,” she said. Her face was hard - harder than he’d seen it in awhile. He put down the gun and actually turned to face her.

“What are you talkin’ about? There ain’t nothin’ for you in Utah-“

“The Fireflies are still there, unless you killed all of them.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Joel said. His voice was steady, and his face was steady, but she looked as if she could see right through him.

She didn’t answer with words. Instead, she threw something small and silver at him. He caught it on instinct, not realizing what it was. He opened his hand and looked down at it, trying to figure out what it was. It was a recording device, sure, but he had a bunch of those in his pack.

A bunch of them, including what he’d picked up at the hospital.

Understanding crept in and he looked back at her.

“You been going through my things?” he asked, voice level to the point of being monotone.

“I went in your bag to get the tools you asked me to find.”

“That was three days ago, Ellie.”

She half-shrugged. “I didn’t have a chance to listen to those until this morning.”

“You shouldn’t have taken these. They’re just shit I picked up on the road, I hadn’t gotten rid of ‘em yet.”

“Don’t make this about me!” she said, yelling the words at him, forcing them out like an explosion. “This isn’t about me! Why shouldn’t I hear the things people had to say along the road? Anyway, you _lied_ to me. That’s what this is really about.”

“Now, Ellie, I-“

“You _lied_ to me, Joel,” she said, and her voice dropped back down, nearly to a whisper. 

Joel took a step forward. “I did it to keep you safe. I wasn’t gonna let them just-“

“It shouldn’t be up to you! What about me? Riley died and I didn’t, and you stood there and _swore_ what you said was true!” Ellie glared up at him. Joel could see the tears shining in her eyes, but she didn’t let them fall. Of course she didn’t.

“They were gonna take your _brain_ out, Ellie!” Joel said, exploding right back at her. He could feel the recorder start to crack as his hand tightened around it. It didn’t matter which one it was. It wasn’t like he was going to listen to it again anyhow. “You think I could just sit there and let them do it? Let them kill you, after everything I did to bring you there safe?”

“But you didn’t ask me!”

“I didn’t get a chance to ask you! You weren’t breathin’ when they found us, and next thing I knew, I woke up and Marlene tells me they’re fixin’ to murder you just on the _chance_ they can make a vaccine outta whatever’s in your brain! What was I supposed to do?”

The sound of the recorder finally breaking was like a gun shot, echoing between them in the small room.

“Ain’t like they asked you, neither,” he said, staring at the floor.

“What if they really could make a cure, Joel? Who are you to take that away from mankind?”

“Mankind? Are you kiddin’ me? Fuck mankind. Ellie, I seen what mankind is like, and so’ve you, and it ain’t all that worth savin’. Now, if they could make a vaccine with just some tests and your blood, I wouldn’t’ve said anything. I’d’ve waited there with you til they were done, and we’d gone after. But that’s not what they wanted to do to you. Mankind don’t mean a fuckin’ thing to me, but _you do_.”

“You still lied to me.”

“You never woulda come back with me if I told you the truth.”

“What happened to Marlene?” 

Joel was taken aback by the change in attack, and it showed on his face.

“Marlene?”

“Yeah, you know, what happened to her? According to that thing you just crushed, she was going to let them operate, even if she didn’t want to. She let you live.”

“Let me live, is that what she did? Sent me out with a trigger-happy man with a gun on me. Not the surest way to let me _live_.”

“Did you kill her?”

“Ellie-“

“Don’t lie to me anymore! Did you kill Marlene?”

Joel swallowed. “It was you or her,” he said.

Ellie shook her head. “No,” she said.

“She was standing there with a gun, after I got you out, and I couldn’t just-“

“Fuck you, Joel,” Ellie said, and he saw the tears actually start to fall down her cheeks.

“Please, baby girl, I-“ he said, moving toward her, empty hand out to reach her.

“Don’t touch me,” she said, taking a step back so quickly she almost lost her balance. 

“Ellie, come on, don’t-“

“I don’t want to see you anymore,” she said, and he heard her voice crack.

“Please, Ellie.”

“I mean it. I don’t want to see you anymore!”

Joel let his hand fall. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m sorry I lied to you and I’m sorry about Marlene, but I ain’t sorry I saved you. I’ll leave you be if that’s what you really want, but I won’t let you run on back there and martyr yourself, either, and you can’t expect I will.”

“I know what to expect from you Joel. I know exactly what to expect from you.”

And then she was gone, leaving Joel alone with the ruined tape recorder and the guns on the table.

Joel’s fists clenched tight enough that he could feel the plastic and metal digging into his palm. He threw it at the wall, where the pieces scattered to the floor.

“Damnit.”


End file.
